We have to dare to be ourselves, however frightening or strange that self may prove to be. ~May Sarton

from my bookshelf

Monday, January 8, 2007

A Long Post on Nothing in Particular

A week in, and I'm finally getting around to my first post of the New Year. A little procrastination never hurt anyone.

New Year's was a quiet day spent at home, napping and watching DVDs (the Big O and Giant-Robo to be specific - I've been on a run of Japanese anime these last few weeks).

Work continues to go smoothly, albeit slowly right now. I am trying to fall into the new schedule gracefully, and so far there have been a few bumps and bruises along the way, but I'm confident that it will begin to balance out properly.

Thursday, M---- and I had dinner with her friend N------ at Bennigan’s. We all had ourselves a good laugh and the 2 girls caught up with each other. Afterwards, M---- and I did a little shopping and talked some more over coffee at B&N.

Friday, M----, R--- and I went to dinner at Mongo’s and then went to see Night at the Museum, which was really quite good. We were all pleasantly surprised. It ended up being just an allround fun film that is great for the whole family. Nothing you had to think through, just something to sit and watch and laugh at and enjoy. That was the last time that I got to see M---- on this trip, and immediately wished that I had spent more time with her. We always do as much as we can during any of her visits, but I can always think of a half-dozen other things that I wanted to do with her after she's left.

Saturday, B--- and I went to B----'s wedding. She looked amazing! Apparently, having a daughter and getting married agree with her! During the service, I thought back to all of our fun times we've had, the trips to Canada, the nights at Paradise, that one crazy night at Celebration that left us all laughing until our sides hurt. So many good times, and all of that was so long ago. It again makes me wonder where I went wrong along the way; where I lost contact with all of these wonderful people that I've had in my life. I think it comes down to the few people that I have lost (A----, R--, C--- to name a few) made me question myself to the extent that I feel sometimes that I am, as a person and friend, worthless. It's a shame that I let these few people dictate the type of person that I perceive myself to be. Did B---- care that we hadn't seen each other in 2 years or better? No, at least to me, she seemed quite happy that B--- and I had made it to the wedding, and if she did, she covered it very well. L--- and J------- are another good example of friends that I lost contact with over the years because I felt that I had been less of a friend, and in thinking that, it became true. I quit trying to be in contact with them because I felt that in being such a poor friend, they wouldn't want anything to do with me. How wrong I was. They have made such an effort to reconnect, that I feel like no time has passed between us. And to the friends that have stuck with me along the way, S---, B---, K-----, I can never thank them enough for being there through it all. This is why I look at so many of my friends as more family than anything else.

Saturday evening after the wedding, B--- and I went and picked up S---- and moved our usual Friday to Saturday. We made it to all the usual Friday haunts: Pier 1, Bennigan's (see a trend with this restaurant?), Target, B&N. I love doing this every week, that no matter what has been going on the rest of the week, no matter how crappy life can seem, I always have this one night to look forward too with the 2 of them. It may not seem like a lot to some people, but for me, some weeks, it's just what the doctor ordered!!

Sunday was another lovely day spent at home doing nothing. Spent the morning in bed reading comics, then a few more episodes of the Big O, then a touch of cleaning crap out disguised as "early spring cleaning"; one of the things I'm working on this year: if I haven't looked at it in over a year, do I really need it anymore? You'd be surprised at how much stuff I looked at yesterday and thought, "Why?". B--- and I had dinner and then watched the new episode of DH.

I'm loving this season of DH so much! Will Susan end up going back to Mike? Will Gabby and Carlos get back together? What will Lynette do with the new daughter? Will Bree finally come to her senses? Will Susan and Bree stop fighting? Who is Monique? Where was the mother-in-law last night? What is the rest of Alma's story? Will this endless line of questions ever end?

This morning, I woke up to snow, and amazingly, I was happy to see it; not in an "overjoyed and ecstatic to see it" kind of way, but I was happy to see it nonetheless. I can honestly say that the holidays this past year didn't seem entirely right without snow (instead we had 50ยบ+ days). This morning, however, it was peaceful, and I enjoyed the drive in to work, everything covered in white. It has snowed off and on throughout most of the morning and into afternoon, and already what we've had is beginning to melt, but it still made for a loverly start to the week.

So there it is - the first post of the new year. A longish, rather rambling recap to my week. Hope you enjoyed it.

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